9.22.2008

The Past, the Present and the Future- Your Brooklyn Nets

If anyone has been paying attention to the NBA the past few years, there are some serious omens in this picture. Imagine this conversation? It probably went something like this.

J. Kidd: Yeah 'Bron, I'm tellin' you man, this dog right here is tha man. I LOVED workin for Jay-Z, man. If it weren't for my ridiculous contract hamperin' Jay's team building, they'd be contenders by now, man. But ain't nuthin stoppin' 'em in 2010, man.

Jay-Z: Aw, man, thanks, brother. Like I've been tellin' my boy here, "'Bron, you ain't got nuthin there in C-town, man." Come Awn Man! Feel me dawg! B-town is THE home of 'Bron in 2010! I already made this team better on the J-Kidd savings plan, bro. Then I sent Jefferson's ass outta here. And look at our kids, man- Lopez, CD-R and we bring Yi along? As soon as I get V.C. off the books, bro, we got ya back.

LeBron: Well you know fellas, I'm not sayin' nuthin' til my contract expires. I'll just play all out for 2 more seasons, push for the first all-season trip-dub since O.R. to get my team to the playoffs, bitch at the deadline that I need a better guard combo than Delonte West, B-Gib, and Mo Williams and make subtle comments to worry our fans that Big Z in the middle is as soft as Beyonce's booty after Jay here is done, man. But other than that, I got no comment on 2010.

J. Kidd: Hey, just don't forget me- by 2010, I'll settle for 10th man in Brooklyn after I burn out another back court in Dallas like I did Jersey because I am losing about a step every game on defense and I could never shoot anyway. 'Bron/Kidd in 2010!

Jay-Z: Okay Jay, I gotcha covered under the veteran's exemption, man. Just make sure you don't go gettin' bitch-slapped around your Brooklyn pad like them days in Jersey with your Ex, man. That shit just ain't right- Beyonce'll think she got some say in our relationship if she sees that shit goin' on.

J. Kidd: Okay man, I feel you. So 'Bron, man...

J. Kidd and Jay-Z turn their heads sideways at LeBron

Jay-Z: You in?

LeBron: Like I said, we'll *wink* talk in 2010.


Note: The above conversation is purely speculative and fictitious and is not intended to represent any factual information that was disseminated by any party.
Except for the part about J. Kidd getting bitch-slapped by his Ex. That we know, allegedly, happened.